Category: Writing

Writing 101: Building a Blogging Habit – First Assignment

~ Spence's Girl ~ 8 Comments

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Having started my blog on Halloween 2014, I only was certain that I wanted to write – and often.  Since retiring in February 2014 (and for years prior) I’d been talking about writing – a book, a cookbook, poems, short stories, a novel, children’s book……lots of aspirations.  Then the reality of being retired took hold and a whole world of interests, new and established, were mine to explore.  I did start a writing class early on and that got the creative juices flowing.  I found I could write poetry – and was amazed at what came out of my head and heart.  But still I didn’t really start writing in earnest until I committed to spencesgirl.wordpress.com.

What I expected:  Everyone who knew me would read it.

What I didn’t expect:  A lot of people who know me aren’t reading it either because they’re too busy living their own lives or are simply not that interested in checking it out.  But I also found out that’s okay with me.  It’s my “thing”.

What I truly didn’t expect:  People I’ve never met (from at last count 27 countries) have visited my blog.  That surprised me in a major way and continues to be an exciting and validating part of the blogging process.  Also, I’m amazed by the variety of people who’ve discovered my blog and have expressed an interest. From teenagers to professional chefs, photographers and stand-up comedians, male, female, gay and straight, parents, fashionistas, home cooks and world travelers.  And a lot of people like me who are grateful for a venue to share their random thoughts, humor, frailties and passions.  It’s been my pleasure to meet you and consider this a virtual hug!

I have days when I wake up early and feel compelled to start writing immediately until the urgency passes and whatever needed to be said has been written.  Other days, I just don’t have as much to say but may find a picture or quote that speaks to me in a humorous or inspiring way.  Or my cats do something too adorable, I snap a picture with my trusty i-phone and upload it.  Or I’m combing through the thousands of pictures I’ve taken while traveling and see something I’d like to share.

Most of all, I feel safe in this blog-o-sphere where we co-exist.  I love getting feedback as well as discovering new blogs and sharing feedback.  It’s cozy, positive and makes me want to get up each day and do it again.

Today’s Writing 101 Assignment was to free-write for 20 minutes.

And for all my fellow bloggers, keep doing what you’re doing as long as it makes you happy, no rules – just write!

Elizabeth Berg, Author – her wise words

~ Spence's Girl ~ 1 Comment

Elizabeth Berg is a brilliant writer.  I follow her on Facebook as well as enjoying her books and I found yesterday’s post both relatable and humorous. Even though I have a very full, happy life it does occasionally occur to me “what if” we just didn’t have all this technology?

I hope you enjoy this and by all means, if you are an avid reader and don’t know Elizabeth Berg’s writing – check her out.

Elizabeth Berg, Author
Elizabeth Berg, Author

3/25/15 (courtesy of her Facebook page)

“I am aware of the irony of using the internet to complain about the internet. But here I go. My gripe du jour is that I learn something, or download something, and then it changes. And then I have to download something else and I try to, and it doesn’t work. And soon I have all these little downloads having babies, you know, the XXX.1, XXX.2, XXX.3, but nothing works.
I feel sometimes like I’m being bullied by people I can’t see who make arbitrary decisions about things that I don’t necessarily agree with, and that changes are being made for change’s sake. I feel that I’m being pushed into using a new version of blah blah blah and I don’t know why. And I don’t know where to go to get help. To the Apple store? To a consulting service, where I will have to admit that I’m not so very sure that I know what “browser” REALLY means, that to me it sounds like a modification of a pretty good dog name and nothing else?
I get overwhelmed with all this stuff. And just now, after trying to download a new version of Adobe (and there you go, why is it called ADOBE????? That’s like calling mocha chocolate cake, wallaby syllable wrench) I had to give up and go and lie down on the sofa and look out the window. And I imagined a little house like the kind that children draw, with flowers in a window box and fat puffs of smoke coming out of a chimney and green grass standing up straight and neat as a crewcut. And I wanted to open the paper door and go into the paper house and live there because I imagined that even though it was pretend, everything in it would be real. Virtual is not welcome in my life anymore. Same with multi-tasking. Same with sound bites, and twitter. Here is what is welcome in my life: Depth. Reflection. The ability to pay attention to one thing at a time so as to see it wholly.

Kindness. Connection. Chicken pot pie.

I lay on the sofa and wondered if it would be possible to live a life without a computer. I think it would be very hard, if not impossible. But it might be worth it. I thought, maybe I’ll write a book called “OFFLINE” and it would be about how one does that. What would life be like without a computer? And then I realized it would be nearly impossible to submit a book without a computer unless you’re John Updike, who is dead.

Please excuse this rant. See it as Maureen O’Hara weeping as she pounds on John Wayne’s chest. Or, I don’t know, Jennifer Lawrence as she pounds on Bradley Cooper’s chest. There. I guess I just updated something after all.

Now I am going back downstairs to lie on the sofa and read. One page at a time. Under yellow lamplight. The only sound the turning of the pages and the whining of the dogs in their sleep.
I miss my mom today. She hated computers, too. She never would learn how to do anything on them. It used to make me mad. Now I think she was a genius.”

Moving Mom – Part Fourteen or Minutia & Adios to the POD

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March 15th – Today Mom is up before me yet again, cleaning the white open metal shelving in her bedroom closets – with a toothbrush.  I have to admire her ethics and attention to detail, she just wants the new owners to be happy when they walk in. After I finish breakfast, I take one hour at the pool, almost certainly my last.

The POD is picked up tomorrow and I’ve moved everything that will go into the car onto the lanai so that we get a visual of what we’re dealing with. That leads to a decision put some of those things into the POD rather than cram the car.  I do a final vacuuming of the entire house so we can pack the vacuum.  We’re now in the “final stretch”.  Every drawer – emptied and wiped out, every closet – a double check of the shelves. Important papers for her new apartment – lease, POD contract etc. must be packed in the car as we’ll be back in Michigan before it’s delivered.  The computer and her flat screen TV are padded and will accompany us in the car so that I can hook those up when we get back as Comcast will come 3/27 to hook it up, deliver her DVR and cable boxes.

We have lunch with our take-out Tiramisu from Bianca’s last night. Excellent. Mom takes a well deserved power nap after lunch while I prep dinner – tacos, guacamole and chips. Using the one cutting board, large saucepan and a paring knife (left for the new owners) I chop the romaine, tomatoes, avocado then brown the ground beef and onions.  When Mom gets up we decide to have our Root Beer Float Break (this is now our mid-day treat and most refreshing).  More packing and before you know it, it’s time for our Mexican Fiesta.

Check out the “presentation” value of our fiesta.
Up close and personal with my Taco Supreme

Having not received an email from the POD people about pick-up tomorrow, I check online.  Scheduled but no time indicated, Mom calls but after waiting forever, can’t hear the guy when she does get a human then the call disconnects.  Operating on telepathy, we look at each other and head to the garage, load those final items in the POD, tie them down, lock it.

It’s a beautiful Monday morning….

March 16th – We’re both up early, I check email – nothing from the POD people.  As I pour my second cup of tea I hear something – the beep-beep-beep of a truck backing up.  Running to the front door, I see that the truck is here at 7:30 a.m. to pick up the POD.  Hurrah!

Buh-bye POD, happy trails to you…..

Moving Mom Part Thirteen – or Let’s Reward Ourselves

~ Spence's Girl ~ 5 Comments

March 14th – Mom was up ahead of me (again), had her breakfast and when I walked to the kitchen I found her half inside the refrigerator, purging out things that we won’t need now that the move is days away. As she worked, she cleaned each shelf, removed every drawer and the door “cubbies” (there’s probably a word for those) and washed/dried them.

We ran a few errands including another stop at Goodwill with donations, ate a quick lunch then cleared the dining room table. I brought out the MAC, she grabbed the maps, TripTik and Travel Guides that Spence had provided from AAA.  Until 2014 (when she flew), Mom has driven by herself each summer from Florida to Michigan – sometimes in 4 days/3 nights and at least once in 3 days/2 nights.  “What’s your preference?” she asked.  I said “4 days/3 nights” and from her reaction it was clearly her preference.  It’s a road trip after all. And I bought 4 bottles of wine yesterday to enjoy after each day of driving (plus have my wine tote with corkscrew, wine glasses, bottle stopper and even 2 small cloth napkins).

Not that it’s just about the wine (it kind of is).

Mom is a member of Club Carlson and likes the Country Inn and Suites because they include refrigerators, microwaves and a full hot/cold breakfast – and the rooms are always well appointed and clean.  Based on her history, she chose where she’d like to stop each night and I booked the rooms for Tifton, Georgia, Loudon Tennessee and Dayton Ohio.  Should we need to modify based on traffic or weather delays, we can cancel before 6:00.  Done!

Earlier we’d discussed dinner and as we’ve emptied the fridge/freezer quite impressively, we decided “let’s reward ourselves” and headed out for a favorite local Italian place, Bianca’s Ristorante.

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The site of many a wonderful meal and memories, it seemed only fitting that we come here.

Mom had her favorite – beef ravioli with their terrific house-made marinara; I choose the Calamari and Clams, sautéed in butter and garlic finished with a white wine sauce over fettuccine.  Their garlic butter rolls topped off this fabulous meal.  But wait……no room for dessert. Never fear, our server Ava brought us two house-made tiramisu’s to go.  It’s a state law that you have to order the tiramisu at Bianca’s. (Look it up if you doubt me)

Good times with Mom and a fitting reward.

And upon arriving home, a beautiful sunset!
And upon arriving home, a beautiful sunset!

Moving Mom Part Eleven – or Sometimes You Have to Accept that the Universe is Giving You a Gift

~ Spence's Girl ~ Leave a comment
Really freaking fragile stuff

 

March 12th – I wake up at 5:30, take my thyroid pill and decide to meditate for a bit so that when I emerge from the guest room, my attitude from last night is decidedly more positive.  When I come out, Mom has already had breakfast and has clearly been up for awhile (in fact 4:30 a.m. – yikes!)  She’s on a mission.  I quickly throw down 2 cups of tea and an english muffin (using the broiler since the toaster is packed) and immediately go to work on disconnecting all her computer components, then packing like a woman possessed (mirroring Mom I might add).  Finally at 10:00 I’ve reached a natural stopping place and head for the showers. Mom knocks on the door to ask me  the same question that just had popped into my head, “Shall we call Hugo and tell him to come now?”  I think I said “Hell yes”  but maybe thought the Hell part and just agreed.  By the time I’m out of the shower and dressed, he’s at the door.  We’d already covered and padded the sofa and love seat (that was loaded a few days ago) and quickly give him a synopsis of what we’ve got going on – fragile, very fragile, clothes, kitchen miscellaneous (you get my drift).  Hugo is great (forget my  disparaging comments from the last post when we suddenly found out he had to come a day earlier than originally planned).  Like a master puzzle-maker, he fit everything in, crawled over boxes to secure the ropes through the “eyelets” then stood up, grabbed a rail and Tarzan-style, swung out over the boxes rather than risk walking over them (quite impressive let me tell you).  He was done in under an hour.  I think Mom and I were in shock.  This was a gift – we just gained a full day by the universe sending us a virtual kick in the pants to ramp up the packing.  We were euphoric, nearly giddy.  She paid him, we high fived, hugged, locked the POD.  I slapped on a bit of makeup and we went to Heavenly Pizza for lunch and a glass o’wine!  (toasting numerous times over the fact that the POD is PACKED)

We went to pick up her taxes (another nod from the universe) that had just been completed.  Then came home, had a piece of key lime pie and went to our respective rooms for a nap. (maybe the packing, the excitement or stress or the glass of wine – don’t judge)

Here is a gallery of the garage, boxes, packing, Hugo and the POD.  The sense of relief is HUGE. (or shall I say HUGO? – another pun – sorry I’m a little delirious)

The moral of the story is that sometimes the universe sends you a gift.  Maybe you don’t “get it” at first.  Maybe you don’t like it. But take a breath (or two), sleep on it – and the next day you’ll appreciate it more than you could have imagined.  Lesson learned universe….and thanks.

Namaste!

Moving Mom Part Ten or Detour, Plot Twist – or Both

~ Spence's Girl ~ 2 Comments

March 11th – I don’t sleep particularly well, but am rested enough.  However as soon as I see Mom, I know she hasn’t slept well at all.  At 9:30 her realtor picks her up to sign the closing documents for the sale of her home of 26 years, we have two full days of packing ahead and I can tell her “brain is too full”.  While she’s gone, I decide to really hop to it, clearing, packing then wiping down shelves, drawers, and scrubbing both pantry floors on my hands and knees – something that physically is challenging (especially the getting back up part). After they return, her realtor comes in to meet me and give the house a once over, remarking “oh you’ve still got a lot to do”.  I’m not amused but am sure she didn’t mean it offensively, she’s been great to Mom throughout the process.  And Hugo isn’t coming till Friday at 8 a.m. so we have the whole rest of the day and all day Thursday.  We’ve got this.

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Pack, pack, pack (Same Old Shit) or “I’ll Take What’s Behind Door #2” (Crazy New Shit)

Look out for the Detour:

We pack, mid-day we do our root beer float break, pack more, then dinner.  We even toast as we polish off a bottle of Malbec about how swimmingly things are going. I compliment Mom on coordinating the myriad of “moving parts” (pun intended).  She thanks me for the gazillionth time for everything I’m doing to help her. She’s really beat and says that she’s probably going to turn in at 8 p.m. then hit the ground running Thursday.  Then she remembers that even though Hugo just stopped by to confirm the POD packing Friday at 8 a.m. a few days ago, she’ll just “touch base”.  She leaves a voicemail.  About five minutes later he calls back and I can only hear Mom’s side of the conversation but here’s the gist “I can’t do Friday, my trip to Miami has been moved up by a day.  I have to come Thursday”.  “WHAT????”  (the voice inside my head screams –  really loud) We are NOT READY for tomorrow and she/we are exhausted.  She bargains and cajoles, he agrees to come at 1:00 rather than the morning.  We allow ourselves to vent to each other for about five minutes. Now fired up we know we have to knock out more packing tonight.

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AND NOW FOR THE PLOT TWIST:

I walk into the garage to grab a couple of empty boxes only to find a pipe from the attic actively dripping and soaking those boxes –  and the floor under them (we’d had quite a rainstorm late afternoon). It’s 8:30 p.m. and I now must inform Mom of the latest plot twist.  Mom is seriously upset as this pipe/leak thing has been repaired twice. The last time (quite recently) cost a bit extra but came with assurances that “it will never happen again.” She calls the after-hours line for the company and tells them to get someone out here tonight. Within 30 minutes, the guy is here, goes into the attic 30 minutes later – he’s fixed it! (though he seemed perplexed that it happened at all but then he’s gone…. into the dark of night)  Mom mumbles, “I’m going to bed” and disappears into her room.  I hit the showers since I feel like a piglet (and not the Winnie the Pooh kind of piglet) and then collapse.  We have already agreed to get up early and pack, pack and pack before Hugo arrives at 1:00.

A wise quote from a wise woman (is my best guess)
A wise quote from a wise woman (is my best guess)

Stay tuned……and enjoy the scenery (again, pun intended)

Moving Mom Part Nine – or Everyone Should Have a Root Beer Float Break

~ Spence's Girl ~ Leave a comment

March 10th – later that day….  Upon our return from lunch and a last stop at a favorite boutique, I could no longer put off the task of unhooking “the music system”.  Mom loves her music and she’d invested in a very good Yamaha stereo system which was also connected to her TV to enhance any show with music.  The entertainment center and TV (and for a few more days, the DVR from Comcast) would remain with the buyers of Mom’s house.  Unable to move this piece of furniture away from the wall, armed with a flashlight and wedging my right hand and arm into the tight space, I get my first look at the back of the stereo.  “Holy crap” I thought.  More connectors than I’d expected but not one to back down from a challenge, I was the only one who could do it. So I sucked it up and began.  The young whiz kid that hooked this up had thoughtfully zip-tied the cords however so I had to snip those (carefully).  Saying a little prayer I began painstakingly disconnecting one connector at a time.  And I found almost immediately that I first had to unhook the DVD/VHS player (more cords) and get it out of the way. Drawing diagrams on note pads (in a way that probably will only hold meaning for me and possibly ancient cave dwellers) I taped notes to cords and to the respective pieces of electronics;  I’ll be the installer when we get to Michigan.  Not my favorite part of the moving story thus far but I did it! (Insert sound of applause and slaps on the back here)

Kudos to me!
Kudos to me!

Mom, perhaps taking pity on me – or being thirsty – or with a compelling need to finish off the vanilla ice cream and 1/2 liter of root beer, suggests “how about a root beer float break?”  To which I perk right up and say “yes and let’s do this every afternoon” to which she readily agrees.

Root Beer Float Break - a necessary diversion and a mighty tasty, frosty little beverage.
Root Beer Float Break – a necessary diversion and a mighty tasty, frosty little beverage.

After dinner, Mom can barely crawl off to bed (at 8 pm) and I’m not far behind.  Two more days of packing before Hugo arrives to pack the POD.  Tick tock.

Moving Mom Part Eight – or One Bittersweet Goodbye

~ Spence's Girl ~ 2 Comments

March 10th – Today Mom and I both awake well rested, even sleeping in a bit. We do a little strategizing but then must freshen up and head out to meet her dear friend Colette for lunch and one bittersweet goodbye.

Backstory: My stepdad Chuck died of pancreatic cancer not long after they built this house we’re packing up. Hospice was called which helped Mom immeasurably in getting him through his final days at home.  Fast forward a few years, wanting to pay it forward she began volunteering for Hospice.  After working in various capacities she was assigned to work in their office for Colette, who supervises over 100 volunteers.  Colette, (a few years younger than me) and Mom just clicked.  When Mom had to give her notice due to her imminent move, it was a sad day – for them both – but not goodbye just yet.

Since Colette is very busy, Mom had her choose a date, time and place for lunch.  Mom and I arrived first and when she saw Colette, the two of them had a long embrace, both emerging with tearful eyes, which made me tear up as well.

Emotions in check, we placed our order for crepes – Chicken and Almond (Mom and I), Vegetable (Colette).

It was a spirited, fun lunch as we caught up on recent events.  Finally it was time for goodbyes, lots of hugs, a few tears; hopeful that their paths may cross again, knowing regardless that they’ll stay in touch.

Moving Mom – Part Five or The Day Before the Pod People Arrive

~ Spence's Girl ~ Leave a comment

March 8th – I slept in, even with losing an hour to Daylight Savings Time.  I knew Mom was going to church at 8.  She loves this church and had to say goodbyes today to people she’s become very close to. Most special is Pat who is in her 90’s, who she sits with every week and that goodbye was emotional.

When I got up I found a note proclaiming “Baked Oatmeal – delicious”.  I’d made it the night before using my recipe (featured under “Recipes” category on this blog) with a few modifications as I was working with the ingredients at hand.  I had to agree, it was great.  As I was finishing breakfast, she returned and we discussed what we need to accomplish for the day.  She had some paperwork to sort through so I decided to skip over to the pool for a bit. (no I didn’t actually skip, I’m 58)

The most perfect pool day!
The most perfect pool day!

With a robust breeze accompanied by a brilliant blue sky and puffy clouds, it was probably the most glorious pool day ever.  I arrived a bit before noon, sure that on a Sunday the pool would be crowded.  It was empty!  Only a 2-3 people in their respective lounge chairs, I dipped my hand in the water to find it pleasantly warm.  Dropped off my iPhone and Kindle, towel and flip flops and took advantage of having the pool to myself.  It was heaven and when I did get out, I had to wrap up in my towel because that breeze felt cool even though it was 81 degrees.  I read for a while, took a call from Spence who put Tipper (one of my kitties) on the phone to say hi (I did most of the talking).

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Tipper, as I imagine he looked hearing my voice but wondering when he’ll ever see me again. Soon, kitten, soon.

I finally forced myself to go back after 1 1/2 hours but no complaints, it was perfection.

Had a quick lunch, finishing off the yet another freezer container.  Quick shower and then back to trip preparation/organization.  Mom had cleaned out the car while I was gone so we reviewed what would stay (provisions for the road) and assessed the size of the trunk and backseat.  What doesn’t get loaded into the Pod, must to go in the car – or be left behind.  Got notification that the Pod will arrive tomorrow afternoon, right on schedule.  With the Pod people coming, tomorrow will be an eventful day. We accomplished more today, especially Mom, sorting paperwork and her desk.  At one point we high five’d, then fist bumped.  For the life of me, I can’t recall why, only that we were celebrating progress or another good idea, perhaps both. I guess it’s not important, it simply illustrates our positivity.

That's one way to look at it. We'll choose positive, it's just who we are.
That’s one way to look at it. We’ll choose positive, it’s just who we are.

So our message to you Pod People, “Bring it!”

It’s a long journey and I hope you’re enjoying it….more to come from the Moving Mom series here at spencesgirl.wordpress.com, thanks for joining us.

Moving Mom Part Four – or the Day We Got Back on Track

~ Spence's Girl ~ Leave a comment

March 7th – Mom’s feeling so much better though the morning is a bit gloomy.  Considering she’s much peppier and motivated, I’ve decided to ditch pool time and follow her lead.

I thought it might be nice to share a picture of Mom since she's giving me a lot of blog material.
I thought it might be nice to include a picture of Mom since she’s giving me a lot of blog material for the “Moving Mom” series. And I should clarify, this picture was taken at a different time.  She doesn’t drink wine for breakfast. (at least not in front of me)

Mom’s Freezer –  A little back story for those who’ve never lived with or visited my Mom.  Though a widow for many years, she prepares a complete meal nearly every night. Entrée, salad, wine, veggie and a roll, pasta, rice or potato and a little something sweet in the evening. As a result, she always has leftovers of some quantity that end up in the freezer filling empty containers which once held cottage cheese, sour cream etc.  She’s pretty good about labeling but prior to the upcoming move, her freezer was either “gold mine or land mine”.  And by that I mean – something really good or something that’s beyond recognition.  And she’s a “dab saver” meaning she wastes nothing so lots of tiny “packets” of stuff. Some of it is comical and we laugh as we toss it. Before she knew she was moving, her freezer was filled to capacity. It must be hereditary as this explains why I need to jump back when opening my own overstuffed freezer for fear of frozen objects landing on my always bare feet.

The plan: identify, pitch or keep.  She compiles a list of what we’re keeping while I consolidate multiple small packets of ground beef, rotisserie chicken etc., into larger marked ziplock bags. Now we know what’s left to use up for our final meals at home.  I’m very creative in the kitchen and a “Chopped” junkie (reference: The Food Network). I love to discover random refrigerator, freezer and pantry items to whip up a gourmet meal sans recipes.  My mind is already at work.

After a short break, we make serious in-roads into both her large and small pantry. I carry donation items to her car and clear the garage of numerous recyclable items.  We eat a tasty dinner of “found leftovers”.

Only once have we locked horns ( probably overstating). Mom was determined to fit the guest room lamp (without the shade) into the same box as her very large, old fashioned milkshake machine.  I’m talented at “spatial capacity” and I told her “no way in hell it will fit”.  She is just as determined that it will.  After a stand-off,  we agree to unplug and de-shade/de-bulb the lamp so that she can try it.  Needless to say I was right.

I'm almost always right. Just ask Spence.
I’m almost always right. Just ask Spence.

But we have to pack that lamp as it’s moving anyway so now it’s ready for it’s own box. After dinner I throw together a batch of baked oatmeal, thus using up more pantry and fridge items including the frozen raspberries in the freezer.  Her brown sugar is packed so I improvise with a combination of white sugar and real maple syrup.  While it bakes, we cue the DVR for the latest Shark Tank and watch while enjoying the last of our Key Lime Pie.

I shall remember this as the day we got back on track.